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Location: Orlando, Florida, United States

Wednesday, February 02, 2005

To have this forever...

Is it possible for a relationship to be like this forever? I had lunch with Rob today and as we’re sitting there eating I’m feeling giddy happy to just be sharing time with him and I start pondering this thought. Granted, we’ve only been together about 4 months, but we’ve spent a lot of time together over those months and I start to think how odd it is that I still feel this great feeling just being around him. I suppose I might be on to something special here. I mean really, is it possible that you can find someone and really have that great feeling just to be sharing time with them for the rest of your life? You know the feeling I’m talking about…usually it only happens during the very beginning of a relationship when you just get so excited or happy to see someone and when you do you have that stupid grin plastered on your face and that special twinkle in your eye. I felt that way with Rob today and I realized how long it has been since I felt that way about someone even this far into a relationship. Sitting there, eating lunch with him, and it was nothing out of this world or special or anything like that…just a regular lunch, but there’s nowhere in the world that I would have rather been at that moment than with him. I love him, I really do and that scares me, for so many reasons.After my relationship with Kenn ending so incredibly poorly, I said I wasn’t going to love again, but I guess we don’t often have a choice in that matter do we? Love moves in and takes hostages and it doesn’t care whether you want to open yourself up to someone like that again or not. So I love him and that terrifies as well as thrills me. As I have said in the past, it is odd to find someone who makes the relationships in your past that you thought were so important and the people you thought you were so connected to feel out of place, but the connection I share with Rob is one I haven’t experienced in years. It is a good feeling though and despite my fear I think we have a real shot at having something both of us have looked for for years. I hope that I will find I am right.


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